Fun facts about everyone’s favorite “noble raptor”:

  • Dinotam’s tears cure cancer, but he doesn’t cry because it aggravates his dry skin
  • Dinotam fought extinction and Dinotam won.
  • Dinotam doesn’t sleep, he waits.  But only on a rock in the sun.
  • Hunters don’t kill people.  Dinotam kills people.  Don’t you forget it, huntards!
  • Dinotam doesn’t follow you.  Dinotam mind controls you in the direction he wants to go.
  • Dinotam eats nails for breakfast with a side of carrion, for flavor.
  • Superman wears Dinotam underpants.
  • Chuck Norris owns a Dinotam figurine.
  • The only thing more powerful than Chuck Norris’s roundhouse kick is Dinotam’s SURPRISE BUTTSECKS attack.

Don’t forget to submit your Dinotam poem to the DINOTAM POETRY CONTEST!!!


True Dinotam Facts — 12 Comments

  1. I think we should flood Alas’s contest with creative-things-that-are-not-actually-poetry and make her spend time pulling out her hair and saying “why can’t people just follow directions!”
    And maybe laugh.

  2. rofl
    I told my fiance about DinoTam and the surprise buttsecks attack. He thinks it’s the best thing he’s ever heard. I think I’ve created a monster.

  3. The original title for Alien vs Predator was Alien and Predator vs DinoTam.
    (The film was cancelled shortly after going into pre-production when they realised no one would pay to watch a movie 15 seconds long.)

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