Around The Garrison

Due to the annoyances of real life, I haven’t been doing much more than sending out my idiots to get me goodies in my garrison.  At least they can slog away getting me gear while I can’t be there.

I have no idea how someone could possibly keep up with more than one garrison.  Mine is at least a half hour a day, even when I’m being super-fast.

Master Plan

Master Plan is the best addon ever invented ever.  Seriously, it takes all the work out of missions.  I liked, at first, assembling my teams carefully based on traits, but that gets old pretty fast.  Also the “yay we win” screens are annoying.  Master Plan gives you suggested teams for missions and fast mission completion.  Yes please.  It looks like Blizzard is streamlining the interface in Patch 6.1 to look more like Master Plan.

Trading Post

The trading post is great.  Don’t think of it as generating resources for your garrison.  Think of it as trading shit you don’t need for shit you do need.  Every day, they take a different resource.  I got level 2 (totally worth it), so I can have 14 work orders at a time, meaning I can simply SKIP the days where they take resources that I don’t have (particularly draenic dust and sumptuous fur) and it still keeps cranking out boxes from the previous day’s orders.  Now, I need sumptuous fur to keep the hubby happy, so when Trader Yula arrives, I stock up.  She sells the furs for 20 boxes.  This works for just about any resource that you need: remember which idiot sells it for 20 boxes, buy it up on that day of the week.  MAGIC.

Lumber Mill

What the… why are you guys just standing there?


Nice photobomb, Pinchington


I got the tier 3 barracks because I had too many followers.  In exploring, I realized it has a tiny basement jail with one prisoner, no doubt illegally detained.



And there’s the stink bucket.  Great.


The UN will be sanctioning me right and left for prison conditions.  There goes my trade agreement for sumptuous furs.

More Fishing. Clearly, I am an Idiot.

I got Draenor Angler, because I wanted to catch the big fishies in my garrison pond (so I never have to go out and fish elsewhere again, like I just did for the achievement).


After that, I wasn’t too enthused about tracking down Nat Pagle, but I did have 24/25 followers, so I could use another one.  I had to chase him to Pandaria where I met this charming fellow.

Oh. Ha. Ha.

Oh. Ha. Ha.


Then Nat sends me out to every zone to catch fish, because I didn’t JUST do that for Draenor Angler.  Whatever, jerk.

Fishing (in hordie territory, in a swamp that looks like pee) with my good luck charm, Pepe, and my companion crab, Pinchington.

Fishing (in hordie territory, in a swamp that looks like pee) with my good luck charm, Pepe, and my companion crab, Pinchington.

Now he’s my follower.  He’s not the most useful guy on the block, but he sells a land shark.  Guys, LAND SHARK.

land shark

If you have no idea what I’m talking about, shut up, you’re a fetus.

Last point is fishing quests.  I was doing the fishing daily for my garrison pretty regularly while I was leveling up fishing.  However, even when I’m maxed out, I still do it because I get 2-5 primals out of the backpack of goodies – and it costs me no time.

See, I never gutted those fishies that I grabbed for Draenor Angler.  They’re sitting in my bank.  So when I get a quest for Fat Finless Blimper Eggs, I go to my bank, gut the appropriate fish (usually twice) and then hand in the eggs to doofy when I return to my garrison.  Easysauce.

I also got Pinchington the crab, my new favorite pet, out of one of the packs.

Pepe Goes To The Faire

I found that little jerk Pepe the bird sitting just out of clicking range in my garrison.  Using Google F. Search, I bound “interact with target” to a key and then jumped up and down spamming the key like a moron until Pepe perched on my head.

I thought Pepe would be bored hanging around the garrison, so I took him to the last day of the Darkmoon Faire

We set off fireworks

We set off fireworks

I took him flying! Yes, I know birds can usually fly.

I took him flying! Yes, I know birds can already fly.

I need to find more productive ways to spend my time.

The Golden Age of Parenting

I always said, wistfully, when I was retrieving Mouse instead of raiding that ONE DAY this child will farm gold for me.

That day has arrived.  Well sort of.  She’s not great at combat yet.  But garrison farming she can totally do.

And, get this, she thinks that garrison farming is fun and that we’re doing her a favor by letting her login as us and plod through our mines and gardens.  She empties the garrison cache.  Then she follows that stupid dog to its treasure (more garrison resources).

She’s even learned how to send out our idiots… um I mean followers.  I explained about matching traits and for the most part she gets it.  Maybe it’s not the optimal matching but what do I care – I’m not the one having to do it!  As long as she’s at least making the effort to get them to around 70% before sending them off, I’m fine with it.

I’ve paid my dues with many sleepless nights.  I deserve to take a nap while my spawn handles my online chores.

If only she’d learn to fish.

Fishing Sucks

So I’m an alchemist.  I was leveling by gathering the appropriate plants, crafting, training, finding out what more plants I needed, going back to gather them.  This was, obviously, annoying and time-consuming.  Damn you, goldthorn!

I heard that Draenor had catch up crafting, which I was really excited about, but then when I trained it all my recipes required fish.  Wait, let me rephrase that – except for the daily transmute thingy all my recipes required more than one fish and nothing else.

I had avoided fishing in the past because, well, it looked super-boring, but it seemed there was no way of getting around it now.

I was right. Fishing does totally suck.  It’s very boring and those dumbass fish take up too many slots of inventory – the big ones, the small ones, their stupid flesh, and their dumb bait for each variety.  The fishing quest is a pain in the ass, but getting +15 is really worth it because now that I hit around 400, I’m getting a skillup maybe every 5 fish.

Well this is "fun".

Well this is “fun”.

At this point, if I ever change servers or factions, I’m paying good money for that transfer because there is no way in hell I’m ever doing this shitty grind again.  Looks like I have a druid main 4 lyfe!  DURID IS 4 FISH!

Selfies At The Darkmoon Faire

Twig and I attended the Darkmoon Faire this week.

She. Loves. It.

I will be so sad when it leaves.  All the stuff there is just fun, with no real danger, the perfect place for a kid to mess around.

Anyway, I glyphed my stag to make sure she’d have a ride (she’s still working on navigating the game world “No, look at your minimap, see the dot…” or “Just follow the orange circle, see, it’s right over my head.”)

Mommy, am I heavy?

Mommy, am I heavy?

No, but your flaming swords burn my butt.

No, but your flaming swords burn my butt.

We rode on chickens and whatnot…

I look like a moron.

I look like a moron.

And looked at the weird people

She calls this one "diaper monster" because, well, his outfit.

She calls this one “diaper monster” because, well, his outfit.

And then she asked how to take pictures.  I explained alt-z and the screenshot button.  And then she ran off to do what every kid nowadays does – take selfies.  Apparently screenies are the new selfie.  The rest of the pictures are from her screenie folder:

Continue reading →

Checking In

Whew!  I’ve been spending so much time doing actual playing (and other real life garbage) that I’m not doing any blogging.  Shame shame.  So here’s what is going on in the world of me:

I decided to make my druid my main.  I do love druid but it was largely process of elimination, as I went through the other healing classes and decided that some of their mechanics were just a deal-breaker for me.

I leveled from scratch because I’m too cheap to transfer my druid and THEN race change (Worgen turned out to be NOT my thing).  And I don’t want to blow my lvl 90 boost quite yet.  That thing is worth $60, even if I got it bundled in the expansion.

Remember how I said that leveling a monk was painful because of the order you learn the spells?  Well, druid is not as bad, but still pretty bad.  You know when you get your first aoe heal?  Level 74.  I shit you not.  Until level 74, you’re screwed. And that first aoe is Tranquility, for emergencies only.  You don’t get Wild Growth until level 76!  OK, maybe they’ve screwed with the other classes in a similar manner, but I HATES IT.  I don’t care that I get a piddly lifebloom early if I have NO aoe tools until my mid-70s.

Outside the world of healing, I love the hell out of druid.  The new travel form combo is the most awesome thing ever.  Sure, I grumbled at first, but then I went flower picking.  So my birdie dives into the water, becomes a seal, gathers the kelp, hops back to the surface and…. turns back into a bird.  Having bird was always better than a mount in that circumstance, since you could jump out of the water and spam the bird button until you got it to take.  No “swimming to shore and resummon” shit.  But the smooth transition from seal to bird in one silly jump is enough to make me a convert.

I still hate how the reindeer looks.  I expect to turn around and find Santa hitching a ride behind me.  But I’d rather have a fast-travel glyph than a cheetah glyph, so I’m stuck with Rudolph for now.

Anyway, the druid is level 90.  I haven’t even set a toe in Draenor.  Sigh.  I’m super-behind. which is OK, since I’m still on gaming training wheels after a 3 year break.  Probably nobody wants me in the first round of raiding.

Coming up in the world of blogging, which I will totally do, at some point, honest:

Druid Weak Auras.  I made some.  I tend to avoid button-looking ones since if I wanted to look at buttons I’d just look at my action bars.

Grid2.  Yes, I’ve abandoned Grid for his much more attractive younger brother.  It’s not hard to set up, and I don’t have to worry about plugin updates.  I went very minimal this time – no icons, almost no numbers.

World Of Twigcraft

Guess who is 6 years old, has an ever-changing number of teeth, and just got a wow account?  Yeahhhhh…

It’s every parent’s dream, when your kid can start farming gold for you. And by “farm gold” I mean “swindle us out of all our gold to fill up the pet journal and the toy box because, seriously, pets and toys.”

We find it highly amusing to listen to her yell at the bad guys, or more often hear her character say “I need a target” or “I need to get closer.”

And, if you’re wondering, I locked that shit down so hard with parental controls.  Especially when I considered that she might be walking through Goldshire.  Granted, her reading isn’t that good yet, but there are questions that I do not want to answer.

I locked her out of Real ID, obviously, but also “muted” her account which means she cannot hear any players saying anything in any channel ever.  We can group with her, although she cannot see group chat.  We were allowed to send her mail, but I suspect any messages along with the mail items would have been stripped.

I also set “playtime limits” which amounts to me cutting it off during the night so she doesn’t sneak out of bed to play video games at 2am.  This has happened.  I was both annoyed and proud.

Stay tuned as I feebly try to curb her swearing at the screen, because I have no idea where she picked that up… (I blame Star Lord.)

How To Make Pugging Better

Dear Blizzard,

I know you listen to me because I’m important, right?  Well here’s what you need to do to make pugging better before I tear my hair out.

1. Better Notification of New Spells

Back in the day, you went to the trainer anxiously hoping for a new spell, and when you got one, you were so psyched that you read about it and slapped it on your hotbar, and, most importantly, you knew you had a new spell.  You had to know.  You just bought it.

In the post-trainer world, there needs to be some in-your-face notification that You Got A New Thing but not necessarily a trip back to the trainer.  Either you have to buy it on the fly for a nominal fee, or you get an obnoxious popup.  When I level, it goes by so fast that unless I’m watching the scroll, I could miss it.  The name of new spells are buried in the list of unlocked instances.  And once the new spell is learned, it just goes in alphabetical order into the spell book, with no indication that it is new.

Here is a good example why we need a spell notification: I met a level 60 warlock that did not know he could summon other players.  Did not know that summoning was a thing warlocks did.  At 60.  For real.  And, as dumb as I thought this guy was, I could see how he could be plodding along and just plain miss it.

Another time, the group stood around stupidly while I was dead on the floor because I had a mass rez debuff.  I said to the monk that he could rez.  Like just normal rez, no mass about it.  This was a big surprise, apparently.

2. Spirit Healers Right Outside The Instance Door

In the group finder world, it’s a safe bet that nobody in the group has any idea where the instance is located.  It’s also likely that none of them have wiped on said instance because instances are pretty easy, and because leveling is so fast you are unlikely to get the same one too many times.

Well, then, when you do manage to wipe by some miracle of stupidity, and you’re in a random area of Zangarmarsh and it’s not particularly intuitive that you have to walk out to the center of the lake and swim down a pipe.  If you weren’t here in 2007 or so, you’d have no freaking idea.

Also, I never did find the door to maraudon.  I had to wait for the rest of the group to run back and resurrect me.  It was embarrassing.

In conclusion, these are my reasonable demands.  I mean requests.  Totally requests.